5 Words

The kids hear them all the time.

I start to say it and they can finish my sentence.

It's pretty much my go to answer for oh, everything.

It's. Not. In. The. Budget.

In fact, I don't even have to say "it's not in the budget" anymore, I just say "5 words" and they get it.

Here's the crazy thing, there's really not that much whining or complaining. No, they're not robot kids but they understand that you have to plan for things. Life doesn't get to just happen while you run around reacting.

Greg and I evaluate and adjust our budget every couple of weeks. When we have those budget planning meetings we look at the calendar and plan for things that are coming. We plan for activities, we plan for family outings, plus all of the regular things that come up like fees and doctor's visits. Everything is planned for and as near as possible we plan for life, well, happening. Sometimes things will come up and we will make adjustments (always talking to each other first) but usually when the kids are asking for something it's along the lines of Dunford Donuts (try some, you will die) or a museum trip. Those are things that can be planned for but unless it's in the budget it ain't happening!

We're under a big ol' pile of debt and we're doing everything that we can to dig our way out. We've cut back. We're working crazy hours. We're praying constantly for a way out of this mess. We also budget very carefully and once we have budgeted we live by that plan. It's our guide for a way out of this disaster!

So when kids (and adults) start asking for stuff around here the answer is simple.

5 words.

*And yes, the picture that accompanies this post is misleading, it's not about donuts but really can you go wrong with a Chocolate Chocolate Donut? Nope, didn't think so!

The B Word

You know, the one. The one that you hear people say and you scream and cover your ears. That one.

I'll whisper it to you.

Budget.

I hated doing the budget. First of all, I had to do it by myself and there was never enough money to make everyone happy. I figured that life would just be easier if I just paid everything and then hoped for the best.

You can imagine how that worked out.

I also hated feeling controlled. Doing the budget meant that I wouldn't be able to go to the store and just spend money. It meant that there wasn't any money to just blow. I preferred the spend what you want first, then try to pay the bills, then move money that supposed to stay in the emergency fund to cover things like the mortgage when you're in a crisis. At least I got what I wanted before I had to face reality.

Pretty grown up, I know.

It's scary to see what your finances look like in black and white but here's the crazy thing, it's usually not as bad as you think it is. You know when your kid won't eat dinner because they're like "it's yucky" and you know that if they just tried it they would like it? Doing a budget is the same thing, we always imagine it to be more painful then it is. But I couldn't figure that out, oblivion was a better plan.

So is hoping someone else will take care of things but I'm pretty sure that's not a solid plan.

But fortunately life threw us a few fastballs and it knocked some sense into us. Now I'm a budget nerd. I check our written plan several times a week and right now I could tell you exactly how much money is in which account. Like I said, Nerd.

So what changed? I didn't get a brain transplant and my personality didn't change but I finally realized that all the experts were right. Having a written plan means that you have more money to spend, not less. It takes away the stress and the worry. It makes money fun again.

It took us a few months to really get the hang of things, we (meaning Greg and I working together) made our original plan and then adjusted categories as we went along. At first our grocery budget was pulling a Goldilocks, too high, then too low and now, just right. We tried to be crazy conservative and didn't budget any money to blow and that didn't work, one or both of us would start feeling a little twitchy and the next thing you knew our plan was out of whack again. So we began to budget blow money, that's money that we each get and we don't have to be accountable for, it's just ours to well, blow.

We're Financial Peace University grads and we think that the FPU budgeting forms are the easiest to use but it really doesn't matter what you use as long as you spend every dollar on paper that you make BEFORE you do any real spending. If you have given every dollar a place to go, you'll suddenly realize that you have more than you imagined.

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