The End

by Kristen

I did it. 30 days. Lots of good food.

It wasn't even that hard. Like I didn't feel like I was going to die because I wasn't eating pancakes (oh my word, I love pancakes).

I did slip up and eat some cookies on Day 26 or 27, I don't remember exactly which one. I do remember how bad I felt the next day. My stomach hurt. I felt like I was moving in slow motion. It was awful. One of the rules of Whole30 is that if you slip up, you should start over. The whole point of the Whole30 is to get all of those things that irritate your body, well, out of your body. That way you can really tell how your body reacts to certain things. I didn't start over but technically I should have. Oh well.

So what did I think?

I loved it! Absolutely loved the whole thing. My stomach stopped hurting after every meal. I didn't wake up feeling sluggish. I had more energy (not as much as I was hoping, but still...). I felt more focused. My clothes were looser. I weighed and measured myself at the end and I'd lost several inches and 7 pounds.

There's a reintroduction period that you're supposed to follow that I didn't. Like at all. In my defense there was a holiday (July 24th is a big deal in Utah), a birthday and a family reunion. My father in law put it best, he said "it's like we've all got IV's hooked up to the pantry and the valve is wide open". Yep. Agreed.

Sadly the IV theory didn't work out so great for me. That stomach pain that I had gotten rid of came back with a vengeance. I had heartburn. I was tired. Apparently there is a reason they recommend slowly easing yourself back into your old foods as you discover what works for you. Binging on cookies and birthday cake maybe isn't the way to go.

Will I do it again, this time following ALL the rules? For sure.

I didn't get the boost in energy I was hoping for but that could be partially due to 5 kids and my alarm clock. But I still felt better. I'll take that.

I've been given an incredible body that does amazing things everyday. I don't always love the way that it looks or the way that I feel but I'm trying to be kinder to myself. Right now that means cooling it on the dessert and feeding myself food that makes me happy. I'm going to try and take really good care of my body because it has to last me at least 70 more years! I'm totally planning on being a centenarian.

Sharing is caring

by Kristen

Anna: "You know how people always share (she used air quotes around share) their music with the people that are driving next to them?"

Me: "Kind of them isn't it?"

Anna: "It would be funny if we rolled all of our windows down and turned up our music really loud, you know, to return the favor."

Me: "You mean the classical music we're listening to right now?"

Nathan: "Everyone would say 'ahh, so peaceful'."

Anna: "Or they would say 'what the heck, what are those people listening to?!"

Yes, it's true, we do listen to classical music in the car. Here's why:

• no questionable lyrics that you have to explain to your kids, that can get awkward
• it takes the backseat fighting down a titch, only a small titch but when you're chauffeur to unreasonable short people you take all you can get
• it makes me feel like a super parent, like maybe someday they'll look back and say that all the hours that their mom made them listen to various composers while they were trapped, was what made them become brilliant doctors and compassionate leaders...

A girl can dream.

How to be a Millionaire, talk to one!

by Greg

I have found that if you want to reach a goal find someone who has done that goal and do what they do. for instance if you want to take up running talk to someone who runs marathons. If you want to rock climb find someone who is an expert at rock climbing. I really want to do well with my money and to be a good steward of the funds God has entrusted me with. So that is what this video is about. It is someone who is a millionaire and that is where I want to be. It is delving into what a person does to be a millionaire and how they got there.

What is most interesting is Kenney in this video started with exactly nothing. He even worked for $2.60 for a few years to get his business off the ground. I don't know if I would have the patience to keep that up but he had a dream and he could envision what it looked like down the road. So he worked hard got out of his debts he owed started gaining traction and then started opening other locations and also franchising.  That is the power of setting goals and seeing them to fruition.

Another thing I found interesting is when the recession hit he took a 50% pay cut to help with the payroll issues they had. I love how this man is so giving. He helps build his team members and if they are deserving gives them a franchise to run. They also donate to several thousands of dollars to charities in their area. God loveth a cheerful giver and blesses them.

Have a happy Friday!

Halfway there!

It's Day 15 of my Whole 30 and I haven't died.

Which is sort of, but not really surprising because for 15 days I've been eating omelets, roast beef, nuts, mangos, berries, homemade mayonnaise, frozen bananas and my body weight in salads. Plus a bunch of other really good stuff but without any sugar, honey, grains, beans or dairy.

This is the longest I've ever stuck to an eating plan. I've beat my old record by 14 1/2 days. Yes, that is a true statement. Why has this one been so easy?

Well I think it helped that I told all of you guys what I was doing. I didn't want to look like (more of) a loser by failing right away so that kept me going. But really, it hasn't been that hard. Sometimes I'll get a little cranky because I want something off plan, like yesterday when 2 of my friends were talking about waffles and breakfast burritos. I sort of wanted to cry and punch them all at the same time. I took a few deep breaths and was okay.

My family knows what I'm doing and they've been really supportive. Especially my better half. Greg keeps saying that it's not a diet I'm on, it's a reset. I love that. I don't want my kids to think that I'm trying to get skinny, I make sure to always tell them that I'm just trying to figure out how food makes me feel. I think they're understanding what Greg and I are saying.

The first week was pretty brutal. There's a detox period you go through where your body is getting used to going without the sugar and other junk. I think it could have been worse because I'm not a soda or coffee drinker, those would have been hard to quit cold turkey. As it was I alternated between feeling on top of the world and wanting to scream at people for breathing too loud. Pleasant, right? Fortunately I think we're over that hump. People can now breathe around me without fear.

I'm still tired but I have tons of energy. That sounds like it should be an oxymoron but I swear it's true. I'm getting more done, the thought of folding laundry doesn't make me want to cry (at least not out loud), I just feel better.

I'm also getting to that annoying stage where I think everyone should give this a try. Beware if you have a birthday coming up, you might get a copy of the Whole 30 book (only $18 on Amazon (not an ad, just a good deal))!

In summary: Whole 30 might be the best idea I've had all summer. Besides the one where I insist my kids have quiet reading time every afternoon. Translation: 2 hours of quiet.

Giving up but not giving in

so little!

by Kristen

In a fit of desperation I opened my Gospel Library app and looked for my conference talk bookmark (I usually listen to a talk or two while I'm getting ready for the day). So I found my bookmark and started listening.

But I guess I should give you some backstory first. Today has just been one of those days. Actually if I'm honest this week has been one for the record books. I've been walking around mildly ticked off at the world and trying not to lose it. There has been a constant battle between tears and yelling, both of which I try to avoid.

I was losing the battle this morning. The last straw was when my sweet little Maggie wanted to help vacuum.

"I help you". 

Yes, I know. These days are short and I won't have littles helping for much longer. I am all too aware of that. This time goes fast. Someone wiser than me said "our lives passed away like... a dream". I agree. 

But I still wanted to vacuum. 

I was desperate for calm so in a moment of Divine inspiration I turned to my app and started listening where I had left off. It was this talk by Boyd K. Packer. About the marriage relationship and families.

I should have added that I was also irked with my patient and kind husband. Why? I don't know. I think he looked at me wrong or something earth shattering like that.

The next talk in line was by Linda Burton, also about marriages and families. And that was when the tears really started to come. 

Thunderbolts wouldn't have been more dramatic, I get it!!

These days of raising children are hard. I am constantly on duty. I don't get a break and I don't get sick days. 

I am allowed to be overwhelmed sometimes. It's okay to feel that I'm just not enough. And sometimes I think it's even okay to not be thrilled to be around my family (occasionally, not all the time).

Because when this life is over I will know that most of the time I did a really good job and that there were even days when I was above average. I know that even when I don't feel like I'm good enough for this job, that I'm really doing okay. These hard days aren't the sum total of my existence, there just that: days, and usually not even days, most often it's measured in minutes and sometimes hours.

So here's a note to myself for the next time I feel like throwing in the towel and retreating to a cave: hold on. You're going to make it and you're doing a good job. Plus you can't give in, no one else makes cookies like you do, it's your gift!

Happy Friday!! Mathew and Heidi Debt Free Scream

by Kristen

Sometimes I think Greg and I have a ton of student loans and then I hear stories like this couple. $300 thousand. Ya, I didn't stutter. 300K.

They were/ are making serious cash but the amount of debt they had? That's serious too. So many times there are people that think that a student loan debt that large should be treated like a mortgage; pay the minimum and you'll get there eventually. Not these two, Matthew and Heidi, they weren't like that. They decided to get out of debt and move on with their life! No messing around for this couple.

So yes, when I look at our income versus our debt, I can see just how far in the hole we are. When I look at these two and their income versus their debt, I realize that they were in the same hole.

But here's the good news; THEY GOT OUT! They didn't mess around. They didn't try to do it differently. They followed a proven plan and it worked.

That sounds good to me.

Debt Free Friday: Ryan and Micha

by Greg

Here is some local (if you live in Utah) flavor. This fun couple lives in Logan where she is a basketball coach at Utah State and he works in the HR department, also at Utah State. Go Aggies!!*

This couple is awesome, they started their marriage by combining their finances and quickly realized that they needed to change. They chose to work on this project together, making sacrifices and staying on focus together.

I love that Ryan said "I believe people are eating their problems". That is so true. It's really easy to go out to eat, overspend at the grocery store and just waste money on food. That's an area that is easy to cut back on and a place where you can see quick gains.

We watch these debt free screams because they inspire us. We're working so hard to get out from under this mountain, that sometimes it feels that we'll never see the end. But then we watch real people doing amazing things and being free. That gives us hope and encourages us to keep going. We're going to make it and we can't wait for the day when you can google "Greg and Kristen debt free scream"! That's going to be awesome!!

*I (Greg) graduated from USU with a masters degree in HR, Kristen will start their Family Life Studies program soon, we've convinced our 8 year old boy that he needs to study their landscape architecture program and we're working on the other kids. Basically we're trying to raise a family of Aggies!

This Is Water

by Greg

This video is a classic, absolutely makes you think. 

We go through our lives each day and do our routine. We drive the same way to and from work. We sit in the same seats at church and in the lunch room. We eat the same food, watch the same shows and do the same things every weekend. 

We get frustrated if things do not go our way or if our routine is broken. I get frustrated with the ones I love the most. Sometimes I don't think about others and the things they are going through in life. I forget that it's not all about me. It happens to all of us.

I need to step out of my routines and try new things. I need to serve others more. I need to live the golden rule.  I do not know what others are going through, they could have unimaginable struggles. I need to step outside myself and give people the benefit of the doubt.

I am grateful that we have a lifetime to work on our issues, deficiencies and problems. We get to choose how we react to situations. I am grateful we have a Savior that helps make up the difference. I try to follow his example and be more like Jesus Christ, the one perfect example. Sometimes I'm more successful than others but I keep trying. 

I don't need to set lofty goals, I just need to try a little harder to be a little better and it will work out.

   

Book Review: Founding Mothers- the women who raised our nation

I have a problem. If I sit down to read a great novel than I'm trapped until it's over. I can tune out cries for Mom, requests for homework help, probably a fire alarm and the kids might get cereal for dinner if it's a really good book.

Okay, so I'd probably hear the fire alarm but it would take a minute or two to pull myself back to reality. So the way I still get my reading fix is to find interesting non- fiction, something you've probably noticed if you've been reading this blog for any length of time. I can read a chapter or two of a great non- fiction book and then walk away, I don't feel that same compelling urge to finish the story. But the trick is to find one that isn't textbook boring.  

I've found a few gems along the way. Founding Mothers: the women who raised our nation by Cokie Roberts is funny and informative.

Writing about John and Abigail Adam's frequent letters, she says "John's advice when Abigail wrote describing the British preparations for war? If it got really dangerous, 'fly to the woods with our children.'. Thank you very much. She must have wanted to throttle him."

Or did you know that Benedict Arnold, the Revolutionary War traitor was married to a woman that was just as guilty as he was? His wife, Margaret Shippen Arnold used her correspondence to her friends to pass information to the British about the American's plans. Fascinating.

All through the book it's clear that the women played a vital role in the founding of this great nation. They didn't have the right to vote or to fight or even to own their own property but they did incredible things. They gave birth to children in horrific conditions and often buried them, they raised their children that did survive and ran their husband's farms and businesses on their own and they did all of this while a war was being fought right in their cities and towns. 

At the very end of the book George Washington wrote "Nor would I rob the fairer sex of their share in the glory of a revolution so honorable to human nature, for indeed, I think you ladies are in the number of the best patriots America can boast". 

Well said, George, well said. 

Debt Free Friday: Tim and Katie

I think it is inspiring when young people have their finances in order. What is really impressive is they realized they were in trouble and even though they weren't making a lot of money they were able to set a goal and complete it. I like how they pulled together, got on a written plan and helped each other to stay motivated. I also liked how they thought of it as a great project to work together on. 

Kristen loves projects. I mean really loves projects. I think if she didn't have a project to work on she would be depressed. Working on this debt free project has really been fulfilling and we have drawn so much closer together as a couple because of it. 

One more thought; they are in their twenties and have no debt. Just think of what you could do with the extra money if you didn't have any debt!! Just think what they can give to people who need it. I can't wait to be in a position to give like that, it will be awesome!

Here is a bit more about their story. Definitely worth the watch. 

Different Hats

Disclaimer: I'm constantly learning how to live life. I don't ever claim to have all the answers! This is what's worked for me, you are probably different. And that's OK!!

I often get asked how I fit college into my life. People wonder how I take care of my family and work and go to school and still take naps. I answer with the flippant answer "that's a good question, I don't know!"

But even though it's hard for me to give serious answers, I do have a few tricks of the school/ family trade.

1. PLAN. Everything. Don't leave anything to chance. I have a planner from iheart organizing that I live by. It has our menu, everything I need to do and what I am expecting to get done during the week. It's even possible that I schedule naps for myself but I'll never tell. I plan out the next week on Sunday nights so that I know exactly what's on tap. I also use my trusty sticky notes to write down everything that is due in the coming week, I number each assignment in order of priority. That goes on my desk and as I complete an assignment I cross it off. That gives me an idea of where I need to be at each day of the week, that way I don't have the weekend rush trying to get everything done.
2. ELIMINATE. During the school year I don't (usually) do projects besides those related to school. I love home fix up and sewing and all those other time consuming projects but they aren't a priority during the school year. I also don't let myself read much of anything besides textbooks and my scriptures. I'm too easily distracted so if I don't even start than I'm better off. 
3. DELEGATE. The kids take care of most of the housework. I don't empty the dishwasher or dust. I don't take the garbage out and I certainly don't clean the kid's rooms. Yes that does mean that jobs don't always get done the way that I would like but I'm teaching my kids to be productive members of this family. That means that they take ownership for their zones and I don't follow behind touching up. I do know that there are some messes that I can't deal with so I do the vacuuming, sweeping, mopping and cleaning the bathrooms. I have a super quick routine that takes maybe 20 minutes 2 or 3 times a week. I won't win awards for the cleanest house but that's not really my goal.
4. ASK FOR HELP. On Saturday mornings my better half takes the kids and they go do something (anything really, just as long as it's not at the house) while I catch up on homework or take a nap. That's a chance for me to recharge and get ready for the next week. I look forward to that time alone. 
5. SAY NO. It kills me to say no but I can't do it all. I try to focus on the things that only I can do. I am a wife and a mother first, student second. Everything else can and will be done by someone else. And if you have known me for any length of time you'll know how hard that is for me to say!
6. DIVINE INTERVENTION. I can't do any of what I do without help from God. I constantly pray to do what needs to be done. He always amazes me with His perfect answers.

And of course there are days when everything falls apart and it's all I can do to make it to bedtime. That's when I try to remember that this is the busy season of my life and I'm okay with that. Occasionally I feel like I'm running around with no purpose but when I look back at what I'm doing I'm sort of blown away. I don't say that to brag but because I think that we're all like that. We are all doing amazing things and we don't even realize the greatness. 

Who Wants to be a Millionaire?

Okay, yes. The title is a take on the game show from years ago but seriously, have you ever wondered what it takes to become a millionaire, or at least retire a millionaire? A few weeks ago on the Dave Ramsey show there was an entire segment dedicated to exploring the secrets of America's millionaires.

I have always wanted to talk to someone who has "made it". I have wanted to find out what they have done to be successful with money. Dan talked to Dave and explained how he and his wife were able to be successful. He wasn't any different from the other millionaires that were on the show. Here's what I think:

• Dan didn’t average over 100k, most of the time he had a normal income
• He was debt free
• They put money away consistently
• He didn’t inherit money or win the lottery
• They didn’t buy new vehicles
• They lived below their income
• Bought things with cash
• Didn't have student loans

Those that are successful follow the principles found in "The Millionaire Next Door".  They followed solid financial principles that worked for our grandparents and they were consistent. These men and women are also living pretty ordinary lives. You wouldn't pass them on the street and be able to guess their net worth. And you know, that kinda makes me wonder, how many of my friends and neighbors are secretly wealthy? Not because I think that's information we need to share (so don't tell us) but I just wonder if there are more people that are able to live comfortably and give outrageously than we know. That's something to think about.

It takes serious work and dedication to retire with over a million dollar net worth but it's possible. And you don't have to be lucky or somehow special to do it, you just have to focus. Oh and get out of debt, we're still working on that part but we'll get there. I think we can all do it.

Happy Friday!! ~Clay's Debt Free Journey

I heard this inspiring story the other day from a man named Clay. No matter how down you are in this life you can get out of it and get back on your feet. This amazing man made restitution to those that he had stolen from. I feel that if we try to forgive others and ourselves, we are well on our way to a great life. I could feel the emotional release when he screamed, it was like we were all there cheering him on. 

I hope we remember that when we get discouraged in whatever we are facing that we fill our minds with positive things. One thing he did to help him was to think of his kids. That inspired him to do the right thing and turn his life around. If we remember the good things in life it is harder to drag us down. Focus on the good and try to repay the bad.

At the end of the day the grace of God is what makes the difference. Clay is an inspiration and an example of what it means for a man's heart to be changed. Pretty amazing.

Here's another video that gives us a better look at Clay's story and some of the things that he did to completely and totally turn his life around. This is one of the good ones.

Book Review: Born to Win by Dr Kevin Leman

As the oldest of 5 I've always been the bossy, demanding one of the family. Just ask my siblings. I like to tell other people what to do (even when I don't know what I'm doing), I like to be the advice giver and I like to be the one in charge. I also recognize that those qualities aren't always helpful.

Dr. Kevin Leman is known for writing about and studying birth order. In his book Born to Win: how to keep your firstborn edge without losing your balance he says "although it's impossible to pigeonhole everyone into airtight compartments, at the same time it's true that most firstborns tend to display certain characteristics, as do most middleborns and lastborns"(Leman, p. 15).

The oldest child tends to be ambitious but always under great pressure. She/ he gets things done and knows where they are going because they've made a plan but they can also become boxed in and be a slave to the list.

Greg is the middle child and he's very calm and definitely a peacemaker. I'm sort of the opposite. Learning how to balance our different personalities is a constant balancing act. I'm trying to learn to stop and consult and counsel with my husband because it's in my personality to just go and do. I figure things out as I go along but he's not like that.

On almost every page of Born to Win I said things like "oh, I get it" or "that's why I'm like that". Absolutely fascinating.

If you're the oldest child or if you have an oldest or you're married to an oldest or if there's an oldest in the world that you kinda like (I think I covered everyone), get this book. Definitely worth the read.

*thanks to my local library for this copy.

Happy Friday! George and Nicole Debt Free Scream

Today's video is amazing! First off is the crazy amount they paid off in only 20 months. $1.2 million. That's a lot of zeros.

Second is, even though they were/ are bringing in a lot of money and are "well to do", they realized they were in trouble and didn't have a handle on their money. It was only when they worked together, budgeted, downsized and sacrificed that they were able to become debt free. 

I love how happy they are during this whole process. You can tell that they are really close as a couple and as a family. Budgeting together and working on a common goal of getting out of debt has changed their feelings toward one another and made them stronger. That is what I want for my family.

Book Review: The Millionaire Next Door by Thom Stanley

“The Millionaire Next Door” by Thomas J. Stanley Ph.D and William D. Danko Ph.D. has been hailed as a book that has changed lives and removed the mystery surrounding wealth building and acquisition. The authors compiled research that tracked everything from marital status, education, profession, to support given to children. It was eye- opening to see that the millionaire lifestyle is not what is portrayed in the media. It is not lavish and flamboyant, in fact it can sometimes be called boring. It is middle- class and not ostentatious.

Here are a few of the highlights from the New York Times Bestseller.

Reduce Debt- Right now the majority of our income is going to debt reduction but I can see that once we get out of debt, we will be able to invest that money in other things.  The average millionaire does not have any debt payments; they own their cars and homes, they don't use credit cards and they certainly don't have student loans! Instead they have been able to use their income to invest and grow their careers, all of this leading to wealth.

Marriage- The majority of millionaires have been married to just one person and have stable relationships. Now, I don’t believe that having more than one marriage automatically ousts you from the millionaire club but it does help to have that stability and support.

Economic Outpatient Care- There are more than 45 pages in the book that are dedicated toward showing the dangers of offering your children support after they have left the home. This is referred to as Economic Outpatient Care, EOC for short. Those that give their children EOC are not doing their children any favors. Instead they are creating children and grandchildren that will become dependent on handouts and unable to support their lifestyle on their own.

Time- “People who become wealthy allocate their time, energy and money in ways consistent with enhancing their net worth” (Stanley, p. 87). Simply put this means that if you hope to become wealthy you must work toward that goal. You have to spend time deciding where to build your career, how to invest and how to shelter your money from potential taxes. Greg and I review our budget, watch over our investments and plan for the future. We don't spend all of our time messing with our finances but it's definitely a priority.

Simple Steps- Being a millionaire is a dream that can feel out of reach for many of us but Stanley and Danko lay out 7 factors that will help those who are working toward the goal of wealthy. They are as follows:

1. live well below your means 
2. allocate your time, energy and money in ways conducive to building wealthy 
3. financial independence is more important than high social status 
4. parents did not provide Economic Outpatient Support 
5. adult children are economically self- sufficient 
6. proficient in targeting market opportunities 
7. choose the right occupation 

The greatest takeaway is that you just don't know who is a millionaire and the person you think is wealthy is probably not. Appearance isn't everything. Instead it's the people who live below their means and are stable and steady. Those are the winners.

*Book courtesy of my friend's husband via my friend! Thanks!

Stanley, Thomas J, Danko, William, D. (1996). The Millionaire Next Door: the surprising secrets of America’s wealthy. New York, NY: Simon and Schuster.

Happy Friday!- Cinthya's Debt Free Scream

Every Friday we are going to share stories of ordinary people who have done extraordinary things with their lives and their finances. Most of the videos and stories will come from Dave Ramsey's youtube channel. Every time I watch these they keep me motivated and inspire me to keep going in this journey of life.

This lady is awesome!! When I first saw this it made me teary eyed because of the trials that she went through to get to where she is currently. She is definitely an inspiration to me and helps me to keep the perspective needed to keep going in our financial struggles as well as in life in general.

That is where I want to be in a few years. Watching this woman tell her story helps me have the hope that I need to keep moving forward on this rough journey. I feel that if she can do it with all of the challenges she faced then there is no reason for me to give up.

Wherever you are in your journey through life, whether you've been debt- free forever or you're just getting started, don't give up. Keep moving. When life knocks you down just keep getting back up. That's what matters, as long as you keep moving forward then you're going to be okay.

If you are interested here is more about Cinthya. Her story is incredible and I'm glad she was willing to share.